Thursday, May 26, 2011

Daddy Talk

Was your dad involved in your life?

Did he share any of the same interests as you?

My dad has always been extremely antisocial. He never ate dinner at the table. He rarely came to family party's or events.  Most the time he would complain about taking any of us anywhere. He just always seemed aggravated.

I guess he did try in the ways he knew how. Excuses were always made for him. My mom would say you know how your Dad is... He was raised like this.. or His parents did that..

My dad  coached my brothers baseball team and my softball team. It was bittersweet in a sense. My brother was great at baseball. For me,  softball was more of a hobby. I guess he tried to be involved and I should give him a gold star for that.  I will never forget that there was a girl Malory on our team and she was a really good player. All I would ever hear is did you see how Malory swung the bat, did you see how Malory got right under the ball to catch it. There were many games that I asked to be benched. There were many games that ended in tears.

Family outings were rare. My mom got involved with Girl Scouts and was the troop leader. She would plan fun trips that we would go on. As far as family outings most the time it was in the summer and it was a trip to the racetrack. Belmont always had fun activities for kids. There was music and face painting. They had a playground. I sued to love going to the racetrack with my Dad. Years later I found out that he has a gambling problem. That is entirely another story. Now the good memories at the racetrack leave a sour taste in my mouth.

I tend  to make excuses for my Dad's behavior. Everyone else always did, so I guess it comes naturally. 

Ultimately my husband showed me what a real Dad is. He is the best Dad he can be for our two girls. We do mostly everything as a family and is extremely involved in their lives. My daughters do not know how lucky they are. Evertime Samantha gets mad and says to him that she doesn't like him I tell her she has the best Daddy in the world. Then I ask her - do you know how I know? She asks how?  I tell her because I picked him out.


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